"This isn’t what we were promised. Honestly, we’re extremely disappointed."
I remember reading that line in an email, and my stomach just sank.
If you’ve worked in Customer Success for more than five minutes, you’ve probably had that moment too. That heart-thud when a customer goes from neutral to irate, and suddenly you’re scrambling to fix, soothe, explain—or all of the above.
Let’s talk about that moment. And more importantly, how to handle it.
First—don’t jump into defense mode
The instinct is strong. “Wait, but we did send that update.” “They didn’t follow the process.” “This isn’t our fault.”
Let it go.
The customer’s not looking for a courtroom. They’re looking for someone who gets it.
Try something like:
“I hear you. I know how frustrating this must feel right now. Let’s look at what happened together and figure out the best next step.”
You’ve immediately lowered the temperature. You’re on the same team now, not opposite sides of the table.
Then—channel your inner detective
This is the part where you gently peel back the layers. Not with robotic questions like “can you confirm the error code?” but with curious, calm conversation.
One that’s worked well for me:
“Can you walk me through what happened from your side? I want to make sure I understand the full picture before we act.”
Often, they’ll start venting. Let them. You’ll learn where the disconnect happened. And sometimes, it’s not where you thought.
Avoid the "hero promise"
This one’s hard. You want to fix it fast, be the hero, restore peace. But that often leads to overpromising.
Instead of:
“We’ll get this sorted by tomorrow.”
Try:
“Let me check with our team and I’ll get you an update by 3 PM today. We’ll take it from there.”
The truth is—clarity and certainty around when you’ll respond is more reassuring than vague speed.
One of my “I messed up” stories
We had a client launch a campaign using our product and the numbers tanked. The Head of Growth looped in half their leadership team on an angry email. I was this close to calling in sick.
But I took a deep breath, got on a call, and opened with:
“This clearly didn’t go the way you expected—and that’s on us to help fix. Can we walk through the setup together?”
Turns out, a toggle was off. A simple one. We fixed it. I followed up with a new dashboard template and offered to review their next setup with them.
A month later? They expanded their contract.
Always follow up (even when the fire’s out)
This is where a lot of people drop the ball. Once the problem is solved, we move on.
Don’t.
Send that message:
“Hey, just checking in—everything still running smooth? Anything else we can help with?”
That 30-second check-in keeps the door open. And it reminds them that they’re not just a ticket ID to you.
Angry customers aren’t a disaster. They’re a chance.
To show up. To take ownership. To build trust that lasts beyond the storm.
So next time you get that email—the one with fire and frustration—take a beat. Breathe. Then go do what great CSMs do best:
Listen. Solve. And prove that even when things go wrong, you’ve got their back.
#CustomerSuccess #CSMlife #HandlingDifficultCustomers #RealTalkCS #CustomerRelationships #B2BLeadership #DeescalationDoneRight
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